Yated Shidduch Forum 2/22/19: Do I Really Need a New Hat for My Wedding?
Question:
Boruch Hashem, I recently got engaged. A few of the expenses have made me wonder. Although my parents are in chinuch, we don’t mind spending $1,600 on an engagement bracelet in order to ensure that my kallah is happy, because that is the norm and I don’t want her to feel deprived. What bothers me is: Why in the world is this normal? Who made this part of the process? I don’t mind buying her jewelry even if it’s expensive, but not because “this is what everyone does” (and lemaaseh it is a lot of money)…
Feb. 20 Shidduchim: The Next Chapter
Shidduch Center Dedicated Shadchanim: What are they doing & Why are they so important?
While many are aware of The Shidduch Center of Baltimore’s pioneering work, there are two questions that are frequently directed our way. First, what does it means to be a Dedicated Shidduch Center shadchan? And second, why is it so important that we have an organization in our city that formally employs shadchanim? Regarding the […]
The Shidduch Center: Creating and facilitating dating opportunities for Baltimore’s singles
Who is The Shidduch Center of Baltimore, Inc.? The Shidduch Center of Baltimore, Inc. was formed in February of 2008 as a non-profit organization dedicated to serving the dating needs of the single men and women in the Jewish community of Baltimore, MD. Unprecedented Challenges, Unprecedented Solutions The Shidduch Center is driven by the conviction […]
Yated Shidduch Forum 2/15/19: Single Men v. Single Women – Who Has It Easier In Shidduchim?
Question:
There is popular myth out there that it is easier to be a boy in shidduchim than a girl.
I am a (lucky) mother to have both a son and a daughter is shidduchim. Although it is a lot quieter on my daughter’s end (which can be a challenge too), shidduchim takes a lot more of a toll on my son. Dating frequently is very time-consuming and emotionally-draining, not to mention expensive. He is often required to travel in to the girl (up to five hours of driving there and back). Also, the overflow of names given to him first just means a lot more “nos” given to the boy’s side. Although boys are meant to be less sensitive, rejection is always hurtful. Once the dating begins, my son also has a lot more responsibility, such as carrying the conversation, deciding on a suitable venue, etc.
I think the boys deserve more validation and sensitivity. What are your thoughts?
Yated Shidduch Forum 2/8/19: Date 1 Was “DOA,” Should I Still Go On A Date 2?
Question:
I recently went out with a girl and after five minutes knew that it was, what I call, “totally no shaychus,” or “DOA.” For the duration of the date, I still tried to remain focused and polite and gave it my all. My feelings remained the same throughout the date, so I gave the shadchan a no, explaining, “I don’t see it going anywhere.” The shadchan accepted it and relayed the message to the girl’s side. I thought we would both move passed it quickly, as it wasn’t a drawn-out parsha. However, some of my closest family and friends (and even a rebbi) gave me tremendous flack and mussar when they heard what happened. They called me insensitive and rude, and said that it is so insulting to be dumped after one date.