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Website sponsored by Mr. & Mrs. Malkiel Goldberger in honor of their precious children | 443.955.9887

Yated Shidduch Forum 1/11/19: Day Dates or Night Dates, Which One is Better?


In my dating experience, I have found day dates to be much more productive and enjoyable than night dates. Maybe it is just a coincidence or perhaps there is something to it.

I was wondering if the panelists, with their vast experience, have found day dates to be more beneficial than night dates, or vice versa. If there is data that would support one way or another, I might do what I can to arrange my dates at those times, when possible. What has your experience shown?


As I am not in possession of any hard data relevant to this inquiry, I can only offer my subjective opinion on the general topic, and it seems to me that the matter lies squarely in the realm of personal preference. 

To elaborate a bit further, whether one is learning, working, or in school, for some, it is mightily challenging to step away and not feel a distinct pressure or preoccupation related to their usual daytime responsibilities. And when that is the case, it may virtually vitiate the viability of truly successful and productive daytime dating. On the other hand, for those who are not of a particularly crepuscular nature, by the time evening rolls around, they are often fatigued from a full day’s undertakings. Accordingly, for such a person, properly presenting and remaining alert and exuberant over the entirety of a date may simply be unachievable later at night. 

All in all, while these are but a few of many factors to consider with respect to discerning the most ideal time of day to go out on a date, the overarching theme is one of different strokes for different folks.  Consequently, I would recommend that each person ascertain what works best for them, and stick with that.

Parenthetically, and to add one final point, unless one is positively incapable of managing through a date at a given time, opportunities should not be abandoned due to relatively unpropitious timing. As with most things, a reasonable degree of flexibility, and a willingness to accommodate others, is well worth bearing in mind – and especially so when the gain exceeds the cost.

May the Yodeiah Lihavchin Bain Yom V’liylah ensure that all who are in shidduchim are able find occasions to date which are most optimal, and which will produce thoroughly enjoyable and constructive dating experiences.